Story time!

Today my mother dragged me out bright and early to the recycling center. Considering I went to sleep at 5 am, thanks to my amusing and and bemusing friend Smelly, I wasn't really conscious, nor did I really care enough to get dolled up.

Which was a shame really because I *think* I saw this boy, we'll call him Dirty, there, working. He is quite dirty, in more ways than one (wink wink, nudge nudge). Well, actually, I wouldn't know because I technically have never spoken to him. But anyway. Dirty is this very good looking and very smelly rocker boy at my school. Imagine my surprise to see Dirty galavanting his rebellious ass around, *working*! No really, go ahead and imagine my surprise. There you go.

So there I was looking quite ugly in all my morning glory. My hair was up in a messy pile of crap, and I had some intoxicating morning breath too! Mmmmm.

I could have smiled, I could have merely drooled on him as I often do, that would have been enough for me. But no, that would have been too easy. And I also knew that this would probably be my one and only chance to be within 10 feet of Dirty, so I got my sexy ass out of the car and practically *sauntered* over to the boy.

First, I tripped oh so daintly over the car. I didn't fall which would have actually been quite funny, no, I got up and at that exact second something flew into my eye. Yet I kept going. I was on a mission.

So with my red, twitchy eye, and my gorgeous morning breath, I gave Dirty a very sexy smoldering look (as sexy as one can be with nasty breath and a red twitching eye), and I purred into his ear..."So, uh, this is styrofoam?"

Wow, I bet he was really turned on.

(2002-09-01 - 2:31 p.m.)